Bike-friendly New Mexico

May 29, 2013

By James Burbank
Print friendly version

Welcome to New Mexico, bicycle enthusiast. We are bicycle friendly here in our state. We’ve spent millions in our biggest city, Albuquerque, to develop a great bike trail system and we’re working harder every day to develop more trails for your biking pleasure.

By the way, did you bring your catastrophic accident insurance card in the highly unlikely event you might want to cross one on our tribal reservations where you might just be sideswiped a bit by a passing truck.

Oh, and I hope I did mention that you should wear a reflective bike costume and a full-body helmet if you are riding here in Albuquerque’s Northeast Heights in the extremely unlikely event someone crosses five lanes of traffic to hit you while messing with her I Phone.

Oh, and I hope I did mention the high percentage of drunk drivers in the exceptionally, almost impossibly unlikely event some misguided soul squashes you like a bug while traveling at 110 MPH entering the highway going the wrong way in his Dodge Pickup, but that simply never happens around here, even though we are forced by law to bring up these extremely rare and almost non-existent cases that almost never occur in New Mexico.

Oh, and have you ordered your ghost bike yet? You should do so before you arrive, and your funeral plan, have you taken care of the all-essential paperwork? I hear Costco can bury you for about $2000, which isn’t too much dough. Taking care of those last details in advance really helps you have a worry-free two-wheeled experience in the Land of Enchantment.

In the laughably unlikely event that you do suffer death or crippling injury due to the very unlikely actions of some highly friendly New Mexico driver, you and your loved ones can rest assured the evil perpetrator will serve no more than five minutes of hard time in the pokey. That indeed is comforting knowledge, isn’t it now?

And has anyone discussed the Malpais Bicyclist Roadkill Initiative advanced by our visionary governor, Susana Martinez? In death you should feed the hungry, so that nothing goes to waste. No use fattening up the vultures that you will see circling forever patiently overhead as you pedal along. It’s all part of the New Mexico mystique, so have a wonderful time on your lil ‘ol bike as you pass through our wonderful, bike-friendly open-sky type state, where the bicyclist is king.




This piece was written by:

James Burbank's photo

James Burbank

James Burbank has written and published over 200 articles for regional and national publications such as Reuters International News Service, The World & I Magazine, National Catholic Reporter, Farmer’s Almanac, Los Angeles Herald Examiner, La Opinion, New Mexico Magazine, Albuquerque Journal, Albuquerque Tribune. He is author of Retirement New Mexico, the best selling book published by New Mexico Magazine Press, now in its third edition. He is also author of Vanishing Lobo: the Mexican Wolf in the Southwest, published by Johnson Books.

As a professional writing consultant, he has written and edited publications, video and radio scripts, annual reports, and investment information for a wide variety of corporate clients. A Lecturer II for the Department of English, Burbank has specialized in teaching technical writing and professional writing. His interests extend from composition and writing theory to environmental and nature writing. He has played a leadership role in developing and implementing the English Department’s teaching mentorship program.


Contact James Burbank

Responses to “Bike-friendly New Mexico”